I've had these verses running through my head for about a week, and I'd like to share them. No particular reason other than they've been going through my head almost daily.
James 4:1-3 "What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Don't they come from the evil desires at war within you? You want what you don't have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can't get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don't have what you want because you don't ask God for it. And even when you ask, you don't get it because your motives are all wrong-you want only what will give you pleasure."
Being a deep thinker, I've been thinking about this and trying to figure out why it keeps coming to mind. I've been thinking, "Am I fighting with anyone? Is anyone offending me? Has anyone offended me to the point where I need to confront them? No. Do I know of anyone who is upset with me now? No, not that I'm aware of. What about in the past? Possibly. So I've thought about those instances where people have been upset with me and thought, "Why?" Could it be they want something I have? Hmmmm. I can't answer that. Only they can. No one know what anyone else is thinking or is like except that person himself. So I take this verse to say that quarrels and fights among us come down to selfish ambition and jealousy. I know selfishness has a huge role to play in marital difficulties a lot of times. It's a horrible thing, and something we all need to work on to rid in our lives. That's why God's word tells us to put others above ourselves and to think of others first.
Blessings on this hot, sunny Thursday.
Showing posts with label Jealousy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jealousy. Show all posts
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #14
Disarming Jealousy by Charles Stanley
How do we effectively deal with the jealousy in our own lives?
First, we need to admit that we are envious.
Second, we need to acknowledge that we are in conflict with God. It is Satan with his cruel desire to entrap you in sin and blow up your life with feelings of envy. But Godly repentance and submission to God defuse his traps.
Third, we need to thank God for what He has done in our lives and even for the people who are the source of our conflict. Resist the temptation to compare yourself to anyone else. Also, eliminate ungodly negative feelings, because they often do not reflect the truth. You may feel someone has hurt you, but God wants you not to hold a grudge or seek revenge. Once you grasp the good plans He has for you, jealousy will no longer be a landmine in your life.
Fourth, we need to pray and ask God to help us see the heart of the other person at the center of the conflict. You may be jealous of someone who is just being the person God has created her to be. When another person is living God's plan, we never have an excuse to be envious of her.
There is no way for you to know all that another person is facing. He could be dealing with some hurtful situation that is causing him to act a certain way. Instead of joining in on the push to get ahead, ask God to help you rest in His presence. When you learn to sit before Him, waiting for His timing and His direction, you will receive a blessing.
Fifth, we need to be willing to wait for God to work. Along with waiting comes the need to be open to God's guidance and ready to obey Him at all times in every situation.
Sixth, we need to ask God to help us hear His voice over the clamor of the world.
Seventh, we need to delight ourselves in God (Ps. 37:4). When we do, we will find that He will give us the desires of our hearts.
The next section is called Surrender Leads to Victory. On Saturday we'll start on Insecurity. This is a long, but fantastic chapter. There's a lot to share here and I can't wait.
On a personal note, our house was appraised for less than we hoped for, but we can still do the remodel and a few other things. We got the plans back from the designer yesterday and will be taking them to the City today. Very exciting, starting to feel a little overwhelmed as we have a few other big things coming up shortly. Aaaahhhhhh!!!!!!
How do we effectively deal with the jealousy in our own lives?
First, we need to admit that we are envious.
Second, we need to acknowledge that we are in conflict with God. It is Satan with his cruel desire to entrap you in sin and blow up your life with feelings of envy. But Godly repentance and submission to God defuse his traps.
Third, we need to thank God for what He has done in our lives and even for the people who are the source of our conflict. Resist the temptation to compare yourself to anyone else. Also, eliminate ungodly negative feelings, because they often do not reflect the truth. You may feel someone has hurt you, but God wants you not to hold a grudge or seek revenge. Once you grasp the good plans He has for you, jealousy will no longer be a landmine in your life.
Fourth, we need to pray and ask God to help us see the heart of the other person at the center of the conflict. You may be jealous of someone who is just being the person God has created her to be. When another person is living God's plan, we never have an excuse to be envious of her.
There is no way for you to know all that another person is facing. He could be dealing with some hurtful situation that is causing him to act a certain way. Instead of joining in on the push to get ahead, ask God to help you rest in His presence. When you learn to sit before Him, waiting for His timing and His direction, you will receive a blessing.
Fifth, we need to be willing to wait for God to work. Along with waiting comes the need to be open to God's guidance and ready to obey Him at all times in every situation.
Sixth, we need to ask God to help us hear His voice over the clamor of the world.
Seventh, we need to delight ourselves in God (Ps. 37:4). When we do, we will find that He will give us the desires of our hearts.
The next section is called Surrender Leads to Victory. On Saturday we'll start on Insecurity. This is a long, but fantastic chapter. There's a lot to share here and I can't wait.
On a personal note, our house was appraised for less than we hoped for, but we can still do the remodel and a few other things. We got the plans back from the designer yesterday and will be taking them to the City today. Very exciting, starting to feel a little overwhelmed as we have a few other big things coming up shortly. Aaaahhhhhh!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #12
Continuing on with the results of jealousy and envy by Charles Stanley
The wrong focus Sometimes an envious person will seek ways to ruin the reputation of another in order to get ahead. When we step out of God's will by becoming jealous, we also take a step away from His protective care. He has a plan for our lives, but we are determined to head off in another direction. He allows us to travel our own path until we realize we are trapped in a minefield set to explode.
Indecisiveness When you are not operating within the guidelines of God's principles, you will not know the right thing to do. More than likely, you will do what you think seems best according to your outlook.
Many believers take one wrong turn after another because they think they are on the right track. They see others headed in a certain direction, and they want to go that way too. God tells us to follow only Him. We learn to do this through prayer and meditation on His Word. When our hearts are submitted to Him, the Holy Spirit will guide and direct our path - a path that leads to many blessings.
Struggle with feelings of depression When you open the door to jealousy, you also open the door to a host of other difficulties, such as feelings of despair and depression. I am not suggesting that you will become clinically depressed. However, depression usually comes when we deliberately invite sin into our lives.
For example, you may be at odds with a coworker or friend, and the first thing you do in the morning is begin to think about that person. You wonder if he is getting ahead of you. All day long you are stewing inside over the fact that you do not have what he has. God instructs us to "cease striving and know that [He is] God" (Ps. 46:10). Actually no one knows that others are facing - the heartaches and difficulties.
As you think about this person and try to manipulate your circumstances to get ahead of him, you become more anxious and downcast. The psalmist told us to life our eyes to the Lord because He is our help and strength (Ps. 121:1) This is exactly what cures a jealous heart, a depressed mind, and an anxious spirit. When you come to the place where you realize the great love and affection that God has for you, you will not be worried about what others have. You will just want God's best given to you exactly when and how He plans the delivery.
We'll stop there for today. There are three more in this section, A loss of privileges and opportunities, broken fellowship with God, and physical sickness. See you tomorrow.
The wrong focus Sometimes an envious person will seek ways to ruin the reputation of another in order to get ahead. When we step out of God's will by becoming jealous, we also take a step away from His protective care. He has a plan for our lives, but we are determined to head off in another direction. He allows us to travel our own path until we realize we are trapped in a minefield set to explode.
Indecisiveness When you are not operating within the guidelines of God's principles, you will not know the right thing to do. More than likely, you will do what you think seems best according to your outlook.
Many believers take one wrong turn after another because they think they are on the right track. They see others headed in a certain direction, and they want to go that way too. God tells us to follow only Him. We learn to do this through prayer and meditation on His Word. When our hearts are submitted to Him, the Holy Spirit will guide and direct our path - a path that leads to many blessings.
Struggle with feelings of depression When you open the door to jealousy, you also open the door to a host of other difficulties, such as feelings of despair and depression. I am not suggesting that you will become clinically depressed. However, depression usually comes when we deliberately invite sin into our lives.
For example, you may be at odds with a coworker or friend, and the first thing you do in the morning is begin to think about that person. You wonder if he is getting ahead of you. All day long you are stewing inside over the fact that you do not have what he has. God instructs us to "cease striving and know that [He is] God" (Ps. 46:10). Actually no one knows that others are facing - the heartaches and difficulties.
As you think about this person and try to manipulate your circumstances to get ahead of him, you become more anxious and downcast. The psalmist told us to life our eyes to the Lord because He is our help and strength (Ps. 121:1) This is exactly what cures a jealous heart, a depressed mind, and an anxious spirit. When you come to the place where you realize the great love and affection that God has for you, you will not be worried about what others have. You will just want God's best given to you exactly when and how He plans the delivery.
We'll stop there for today. There are three more in this section, A loss of privileges and opportunities, broken fellowship with God, and physical sickness. See you tomorrow.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #11
Continuing on with The Truth About the Landmines of Jealousy and Envy by Charles Stanley
The consequences of jealousy and envy are deadly.
A critical spirit Jealousy breeds sin, and it also is a direct pathway to cynicism. People who become jealous at the mention of another's success or something a friend has received are usually very negative. They look for ways to undermine the efforts of others.
A divided mind. If you are jealous, you will not be able to focus clearly. In fact, you will be distracted. You may have sensed God telling you to go forward in a certain direction. Instead of moving out to do His will, you linger, wondering who is going to get the next assignment.
Anger, bitterness, and resentfulness. You can only suppress bitterness so long. This is because attitudes like bitterness and jealousy are written in the eyes. Anger and bitterness are written on a person's countenance. The author of Provers wrote, "The north wind brings forth rain, / And a backbiting tongue, and angry countenance." (25:23)
A sense of insecurity. Jealousy changes the object of our focus. We become insecure, wondering whether we have done the right thing. It is important to be the best you can be at work, in relationships, and in church or civic projects, but you should never forget you are living on God's timeline within His economy. He has a plan to bless you, but first you must learn to follow Him.
We'll look at the next six consequences of jealousy and envy tomorrow. There's good stuff here, good warnings to keep our hearts in check. Have a blessed day!
The consequences of jealousy and envy are deadly.
A critical spirit Jealousy breeds sin, and it also is a direct pathway to cynicism. People who become jealous at the mention of another's success or something a friend has received are usually very negative. They look for ways to undermine the efforts of others.
A divided mind. If you are jealous, you will not be able to focus clearly. In fact, you will be distracted. You may have sensed God telling you to go forward in a certain direction. Instead of moving out to do His will, you linger, wondering who is going to get the next assignment.
Anger, bitterness, and resentfulness. You can only suppress bitterness so long. This is because attitudes like bitterness and jealousy are written in the eyes. Anger and bitterness are written on a person's countenance. The author of Provers wrote, "The north wind brings forth rain, / And a backbiting tongue, and angry countenance." (25:23)
A sense of insecurity. Jealousy changes the object of our focus. We become insecure, wondering whether we have done the right thing. It is important to be the best you can be at work, in relationships, and in church or civic projects, but you should never forget you are living on God's timeline within His economy. He has a plan to bless you, but first you must learn to follow Him.
We'll look at the next six consequences of jealousy and envy tomorrow. There's good stuff here, good warnings to keep our hearts in check. Have a blessed day!
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #10
Your Situation From God's Perspective by Charles Stanley
Jealousy starts inside us - usually with a thought or a feeling that another person has more than we do. Our first inclination is to deny its existence: "I'm not really jealous." Deep inside, however, we look for ways to undermine the other person. We may accomplish this through shutting this person out of our lives or working to turn others against him or her. There is a simple principle we must not forget: we reap what we sow, more than we sow, and later than we sow.
The earmarks of jealousy include the following:
Comparison
Competition. Whether it is on the job or in your neighborhood, a competitive attitude can breed anxiety, depression, and hopelessness because it tempts yo to ask, Am I as good as or even better than him or her? The question you really need to ask is, Am I doing my best?
Fear A jealous person is fearful of being replaced by somebody or something. Strife and dissension are two of the devil's favorite weapons for war. He wants us to be at odds with God and others. The solution to jealousy is not to deny it, because you can never defeat envy and resentment on your own. It is found in admitting it to the Lord, asking Him to forgive you, and then praying that He would help you see your life from His perspective.
Many people in our world are struggling with feelings of depression, and so much of it could be avoided if only they would rest in God's providential care. I know there are clinical reasons for some depression, but far too often the anxiety and stress people feel come from the overflow of the pressure they place on themselves.
We'll stop there today. Next we'll look at the truth about the landmines of jealousy and envy. Just a side note, I've noticed that warfare usually comes before we're about to really make a difference for God. Many times the enemy starts working to create havoc in our lives before we even know we've been called. You may be reading this and struggling to understand why things are happening they way they are in your life. It could be that you're about to change something in your spiritual life, God is about to call you to something great, and you don't even know it yet. Be courageous, anxious to see what God will be unfolding in your life and face the enemy head on. He'll 'run like the devil'!
Jealousy starts inside us - usually with a thought or a feeling that another person has more than we do. Our first inclination is to deny its existence: "I'm not really jealous." Deep inside, however, we look for ways to undermine the other person. We may accomplish this through shutting this person out of our lives or working to turn others against him or her. There is a simple principle we must not forget: we reap what we sow, more than we sow, and later than we sow.
The earmarks of jealousy include the following:
Comparison
Competition. Whether it is on the job or in your neighborhood, a competitive attitude can breed anxiety, depression, and hopelessness because it tempts yo to ask, Am I as good as or even better than him or her? The question you really need to ask is, Am I doing my best?
Fear A jealous person is fearful of being replaced by somebody or something. Strife and dissension are two of the devil's favorite weapons for war. He wants us to be at odds with God and others. The solution to jealousy is not to deny it, because you can never defeat envy and resentment on your own. It is found in admitting it to the Lord, asking Him to forgive you, and then praying that He would help you see your life from His perspective.
Many people in our world are struggling with feelings of depression, and so much of it could be avoided if only they would rest in God's providential care. I know there are clinical reasons for some depression, but far too often the anxiety and stress people feel come from the overflow of the pressure they place on themselves.
We'll stop there today. Next we'll look at the truth about the landmines of jealousy and envy. Just a side note, I've noticed that warfare usually comes before we're about to really make a difference for God. Many times the enemy starts working to create havoc in our lives before we even know we've been called. You may be reading this and struggling to understand why things are happening they way they are in your life. It could be that you're about to change something in your spiritual life, God is about to call you to something great, and you don't even know it yet. Be courageous, anxious to see what God will be unfolding in your life and face the enemy head on. He'll 'run like the devil'!
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #9
Winning the Struggle of Jealousy by Charles Stanley
Doctors now believe that so much of the sickness and even depression and anxiety people experience comes as a result of feeling jealous, guilty, angry, hostile, and unforgiving toward others.
It is common knowledge that landmines such as unforgiveness, fear, jealousy, envy, and more take a toll on us physically. We must work through these emotional landmines or face the consequences, which usually show up in our physical health.
Often when we are tempted to become jealous, we are afraid that someone will take our place. There is a possessiveness hidden within jealousy that is very dangerous.
I have to stop short today. Lots to do in a short amount of time. Things are moving along with the remodel. We are waiting for revised plans and yesterday we locked in our loan. It was the first time that I didn't get a call that said, the rate just went up another 1/8 or 1/4 of a percent, but instead got a call that it went down 1/8 of a point! That's what happens when your mortgage broker is a Christian! Have a great Saturday!
Doctors now believe that so much of the sickness and even depression and anxiety people experience comes as a result of feeling jealous, guilty, angry, hostile, and unforgiving toward others.
It is common knowledge that landmines such as unforgiveness, fear, jealousy, envy, and more take a toll on us physically. We must work through these emotional landmines or face the consequences, which usually show up in our physical health.
Often when we are tempted to become jealous, we are afraid that someone will take our place. There is a possessiveness hidden within jealousy that is very dangerous.
I have to stop short today. Lots to do in a short amount of time. Things are moving along with the remodel. We are waiting for revised plans and yesterday we locked in our loan. It was the first time that I didn't get a call that said, the rate just went up another 1/8 or 1/4 of a percent, but instead got a call that it went down 1/8 of a point! That's what happens when your mortgage broker is a Christian! Have a great Saturday!
Friday, March 14, 2008
Spiritual Warfare #8
The Landmines of Jealousy and Envy by Charles Stanley
Whenever you sense feelings of envy and jealousy growing, you must answer two questions: How will I respond to the jealous feelings, and how will I deal with my actions, which usually include feelings of anger? Before launching a full-blown assault on the person you believe is your offender, you need to remember Satan's primary goal: shift your focus away from God and onto your circumstances.
You may feel forgotten in a relationship, on your job, or even in your church, but He will never overlook you.
Detonating the Landmine of Jealousy
If you only see your life in light of what you don't have when compared to someone else, you will never learn to enjoy what God has given you.
You may be thinking, Doesn't God say He is jealous for us? The answer is yes, but it is a different type of jealousy; it is not the kind of jealousy that leads to envy and sin. It is a protective jealousy that is much greater than a loving parent would have for a son or daughter.
If we do not receive what we think we should, we become jealous, and in doing so we overlook God's goodness and holiness. We sidestep His love and miss a wonderful opportunity for a deeper relationship with Him.
Learning to live apart from jealousy may seem hard to do, but it is not. To accomplish this we must come to a point where we realize that partial obedience is not obedience. In other words, you cannot be kind to a person in her presence and then behind her back spew out words of jealousy and envy against her.
He [God] tells us it [jealousy] is wrong because He knows it divides our minds and creates an atmosphere of resentment in our hearts.
In a very real way, the various landmines mentioned in this book are connected. Often one explosion can lead to another. Jealousy can create an atmosphere of anxiety and fear within our hearts.
The flow will go something like this: jealousy leads to envy and envy to anger and anger to fear. The cycle will continue until we become paralyzed or until we turn to God and ask for His intervention.
Anyone who trusts God for the future should never be threatened by the blessings given to another person.
Jealousy is a Matter of Choice
Everything - learning to obey God starts with a heart that is turned toward Him. Anything that threatens to erode our relationship with God should be avoided at all costs.
Tomorrow we'll look at Winning the Struggle of Jealousy. It's important to note a few of the things quoted in this chapter so far. The first is that partial obedience isn't obedience. The second is that one landmine can lead to another in a chain reaction. That's why it's so important to check our hearts as soon as we feel a negative feeling coming over us towards another person. I've seen this particular landmine start in insecurity and lead to gossip and the exclusion of others. Insecurity will be covered in Chapter 5. Some of the other topics we'll cover are Compromise, Unforgiveness, Disappointment, Fear, Immorality, and Slothfulness (laziness). Should be a fun ride!
Whenever you sense feelings of envy and jealousy growing, you must answer two questions: How will I respond to the jealous feelings, and how will I deal with my actions, which usually include feelings of anger? Before launching a full-blown assault on the person you believe is your offender, you need to remember Satan's primary goal: shift your focus away from God and onto your circumstances.
You may feel forgotten in a relationship, on your job, or even in your church, but He will never overlook you.
Detonating the Landmine of Jealousy
If you only see your life in light of what you don't have when compared to someone else, you will never learn to enjoy what God has given you.
You may be thinking, Doesn't God say He is jealous for us? The answer is yes, but it is a different type of jealousy; it is not the kind of jealousy that leads to envy and sin. It is a protective jealousy that is much greater than a loving parent would have for a son or daughter.
If we do not receive what we think we should, we become jealous, and in doing so we overlook God's goodness and holiness. We sidestep His love and miss a wonderful opportunity for a deeper relationship with Him.
Learning to live apart from jealousy may seem hard to do, but it is not. To accomplish this we must come to a point where we realize that partial obedience is not obedience. In other words, you cannot be kind to a person in her presence and then behind her back spew out words of jealousy and envy against her.
He [God] tells us it [jealousy] is wrong because He knows it divides our minds and creates an atmosphere of resentment in our hearts.
In a very real way, the various landmines mentioned in this book are connected. Often one explosion can lead to another. Jealousy can create an atmosphere of anxiety and fear within our hearts.
The flow will go something like this: jealousy leads to envy and envy to anger and anger to fear. The cycle will continue until we become paralyzed or until we turn to God and ask for His intervention.
Anyone who trusts God for the future should never be threatened by the blessings given to another person.
Jealousy is a Matter of Choice
Everything - learning to obey God starts with a heart that is turned toward Him. Anything that threatens to erode our relationship with God should be avoided at all costs.
Tomorrow we'll look at Winning the Struggle of Jealousy. It's important to note a few of the things quoted in this chapter so far. The first is that partial obedience isn't obedience. The second is that one landmine can lead to another in a chain reaction. That's why it's so important to check our hearts as soon as we feel a negative feeling coming over us towards another person. I've seen this particular landmine start in insecurity and lead to gossip and the exclusion of others. Insecurity will be covered in Chapter 5. Some of the other topics we'll cover are Compromise, Unforgiveness, Disappointment, Fear, Immorality, and Slothfulness (laziness). Should be a fun ride!
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