Food for Thought

I subscribe to Leadership Weekly Newsletter, delivered to me via email. I found this article and had to share it. The author is reviewing a book called Mixed Ministry. She gives the good and bad of the book and I wanted to highlight a few paragraphs from her review. The book is about men and women working together in ministry. You can read the entire review here.

The reason I share this is that I believe the author did a great job articulating my heart in this area. I don't agree completely with the 'Modesto Manifesto' started by Billy Graham when he was in Modesto, CA doing a crusade many years ago. If you aren't familiar with it, it came at a time when many evangelists were traveling around the country doing crusades and revivals. These evangelists were traveling away from their families for weeks or months at a time, and unfortunately, some of them compromised their marriages. Billy Graham, being the very upright, moral man that he is, set boundaries for himself and the men he traveled with. One of the boundaries was that men were not allowed to ride in a car alone with a woman. Though I believe this was a timely and needed rule at the time I don't think it should apply to every ministry in this day and age. Irregardless of where I've worked, I never had a problem with riding alone in a car with a man for work. Some have said they don't do it because a congregant may see them and start a rumor. My position is that my God is bigger than the tongue of an unwise individual, believer or non-believer and that my God will protect my reputation. I trust me and I trust who I choose to drive with. Besides, not much can happen in a moving vehicle in broad daylight.

The author writes:

The foundational premise in Mixed Ministry is that men and women should view each other as brothers and sisters in a spiritual family, and that this mindset will transform how the genders interact with each other in ministry settings. Just as siblings can experience feelings of endearment without sexual entanglement, so ministry colleagues can work together in a spirit of brotherly and sisterly love, mutual respect, and protection.

Yet the authors correctly point out that many church leaders are afraid of mixed ministry. Unsure of how to relate to the opposite sex, and because of some bad experiences, they often run from it completely. But doing so, the authors explain, actually increases the chance for sin.

"Leaders don't admit they struggle," they write, "and what stays in the dark has a secret place to grow." One of the best things about the book is how it challenges leaders to engage in conversation about this weighty issue.

Another key point mentioned several times in the book but perhaps not emphasized enough, is that leaders are responsible for their own emotional and spiritual health. Contrary to the opinion of some, men can control their sexual urges. Women can learn to meet their emotional needs outside of the workplace. Again, the point is not legalistic safeguards, but emotionally healthy relationships.

I'm interested in reading this whole book. I think some ministries may need to have boundaries like not riding in cars with the opposite sex if there are attractions between married individuals, but I think it should be left up to the individuals in most cases, and if the congregants are taught the dangers of gossip and slander, it shouldn't be an issue in that arena either.